what are those things up in the sky? Oh yeah, pigs are flying…
We did it.
We went to church on Sunday.
I never realized how much work it would be to get a family that has gotten VERY used to sleeping in on Sundays to go to a 9:30am church service.
Apparently, my constant whining complaining coaxing of my husband and children about the importance of finding a church HOME and a church FAMILY before getting knee-deep in our adoption journey worked.
I have this very specific picture of what I want in a church. We have been to several churches in the area over the last couple years, and none of them have been quite what we are looking for.
In my mind, I have this running checklist of what we want or need in a church:
1. It needs to be located in our community.
2. It must have good music. We prefer the churches with an actual band that plays upbeat Christian music.
3. We want to walk into the church on any given Sunday and see people we know from our community.
4. The pastor has to have personality, and a good sense of humor.
5. I like being handed a church bulletin chocked full of activities– small groups, bible study, kids functions, women’s luncheons, etc
6. The church has to be big enough that we don’t feel like we are the only ones there, but not too big that we feel lost in the crowd.
7. When I walk into the door of a church for the first time, I want to be greeted with a warm welcome and a handshake.
I understand that the experience of going to church is not about me. It’s all about God. So while I don’t expect people to jump up and cheer when we walk in the door each week, I want a church that is welcoming. A church that feels like HOME. A church that feels like family.
The church we visited yesterday was probably the closest we have gotten to finding our church home yet. Of the 7 items on the checklist, this church fit all but one of them. And that one that I couldn’t check off the list is still leaving me scratching my head wondering WHY.
The church is located in our community, and actually is in the town my kids go to school at. The music was awesome, the band included an electric guitar and bass, there was a drummer, someone played the keyboard and there were 4 singers. I recognized all of the songs and I knew some of them by heart, so that was a huge plus for me.
We walked into this church and were immediately greeted with a very warm welcome, and several handshakes. One of the church deacons took us on a tour and showed our daughter where the children’s church was. The church has a nursery, a toddler room, a kids church (ages 5-12) and also a Youth hangout for ages 13-18.
We were given a church bulletin listing several activities going on over the next couple weeks, from small groups to women’s get-togethers, and even some things for the kids.
Unfortunately, we picked a day that the lead pastor was gone. Instead we listened to an amazing sermon by the 29-year old youth pastor. Prior to going to this church, I took advantage of downloading this church’s most recent sermons from iTunes onto my iPod, so I was able to get a feel for the lead pastor ahead of time. Awesome sermons, so I am looking forward to trying this church again.
So what was wrong with this church? Maybe I am being too picky, but I have to mention it. I found it odd that in a community of hundreds of school-aged kids, there was not one single child in the church that we knew. Keeping in mind that between my two daughters, they know every single kid in the school district, if not personally then they can recognize a name or a face. I just thought it was strange, as I expected to pick my daughter up after the service and tell me about all the school friends she saw there. But there were NONE.
I have no idea why that strikes me as odd, but it does.
Based on our rule to give every church we attend three consecutive Sundays before we decide which one to attend permanently, we will go back again this weekend. Maybe we caught it on an off day, maybe people were out of town. Maybe people knew the lead pastor was gone, and that affected the attendance. You never can tell, so we’ll see how the next couple weeks go.
By Jackie, January 26, 2010 @ 7:57 AM
You just wrote my list of requirements in a church. We have had the same types of issues. We have landed at least temporarily at a huge church because it came the closest to meeting all my requirements. It’s not perfect but it works for now and the music is great. It’s hard to get everyone out the door and that is one of the reasons we neglected going for so long. Well, I’m glad to know I’m not alone in the is struggle. I hope this is the ONE for you.
Jackie
By Jenni, January 26, 2010 @ 10:30 AM
I appreciate the comment. I feel like sometimes I am being very petty and shallow about what we want in a church, but in truth, it is the EXACT description of the church we used to attend before we moved. I need to just clone that church and things would be perfect. Glad to hear I’m not alone in my search!
By Belinda, January 27, 2010 @ 4:05 PM
I remember when we were church shopping it was like pulling teeth! We’d walk in some churches and get bombarded! Once we were even invited to the pastors house for lunch…a 6 of us. That’s a little overboard I think in recruitment. I like a big church where no one is gonna notice if we happen to sleep in and miss a week. It has to have a great children’s program so my kids WANT to go. We have been going to our church for just over 2 years and still have yet to commit! That’s bad I know. I help with nursery, preschool, bible school. We have participated in the sports. We give them money. We just aren’t members yet. Not sure what is standing in our way. I just know that I don’t want to church shop anytime soon. Good luck! Give it another week and see how you feel. Go with your gut.
By Jenni, January 28, 2010 @ 9:10 AM
It seems like churches are really recruiting hard for young families like yours and mine. We’re a hot commodity.
By tamara b, January 28, 2010 @ 4:03 PM
i think i saw the pigs flying… just kidding. I emailed you and then thought, well I might as well just go look to see if she blogged about it.
That is interesting that no kids they knew. I would be curious where the kids are from that were at church. And I wonder if the kids were at some youth thing but then that would mean the youth pastor would be gone and not the one preaching. Hmm, I’m curious what you find this week.
And you’re right, it’s about God and that’s a good point to remember!
We have the same thing in our church though. Some of our friends started at our church because we have a nursery. It’s amazing what catches people’s attention!
tamara b´s last blog ..
By Jenni, January 28, 2010 @ 8:22 PM
T – You’re hilarious!